Intimacy. It’s a loaded word, calling up questions about sex and marriage, but also about relationships with family and friends. It’s a concept that requires work and attention. And sometimes, a little help. So the podcast Intimate Knowledge is here to have “an honest, uncensored conversation” about intimacy: sex, relationships, pregnancy and motherhood, marriage and divorce, and everything in between. Hosted by Brooke Burke, Meghan King Edmonds, and sex and intimacy coach Lila Darville, this podcast will get into everything spicy, sweet, and sour about sex and love. On this episode, the ladies dive right in, talking about what intimacy really is, how to keep the spice alive in a marriage, menopause, circumcision, and much more.
Intimacy is hard to define, Brooke says; she’s still working on her own interpretation, and so far it means “human connection and honesty and vulnerability and a whole lot of other things.” Lila agrees, pointing out that communicating our feelings, let alone getting in touch with what they are, has been seen in the past as “inherent and natural,” but it’s really a skill we have to work on intentionally. “Acquiring the tools to be able to identify what it is that we want, what we're feeling, and be guided by that and to be able to share that with someone else...I really think that it's a skill.”
Communication is the watchword with sex, as well, and many women wonder the same thing: how to keep the sex drive alive after the initial heat has worn off. Everyone’s been there: when you first get together, you can’t get enough of each other. But at some point, the desire wanes, and for some, that’s when eyes start to wander. How can we keep the sex hot, keep our partners attracted, keep ourselves attracted? Lila says it’s an interesting line to walk. “Desire comes from difference, from novelty, from change, from mystery,” she says. But because we desire that person, we try to find commonalities: things we both like, things we like to do together, creating shared memories that lead to closeness and connection. “Intimacy comes from sameness...And that’s the exact thing that makes the desire dwindle. You have to consciously create the difference,” Lila continues. “Love is a verb, an action. You got to do something.”
Join Brooke, Meghan, and Lila as they talk about everything “vulnerable and a little bit scary and super intimate,” from whether or not to circumcise their children, to navigating sex during pregnancy and menopause, to the difference between intimacy and sex (because of course you can have one without the other), and getting in touch with why we crave a partner in today’s society, on this frank and forthright episode of Intimate Knowledge.
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